SNSD Marchen Fantasy Solo Performances Review

To those of you who don't know... I'm a Sone.

However I'm not a delulu, nor am I one of those sones who is completely into SNSD and tracks their every move and what they do. Quite frankly I think I'm more into SPICA and SHINee.

This concert however has stuff like this...

Goddamn!

And this...

Goddamn!!

 A bit of this...

Goddamn!!!

And finally a bit of this.

AHH!!! MY BIAS!!

So yeah, it's a good day to be a Sone right about now.

But as much as I want to just post pics of the performance, I actually do have to review this thing, so here goes.

Don't they look cute together?

The first song I'm gonna review is Tiffany and Onew doing a duet on "A Whole New World", both these idols have some decent command of the English Language and they both have good enough voices that it should go pretty smoothly.

Unfortunately, I'm only going off of a fancam here.

But these two sound great together! The harmonies are on-point, Tiffany sounds great and Onew sounds amazing, the vocal runs are on point and they look great.

My only concern is that the chemistry is just so dead in this song and that is really bad if they want to do a classic like this ANY justice. Furthermore, even though I praised the vocals, it does seem like they were trying to outdo each other the entire time and that further ruins it for me.

Finally, that ending was just so bloody awkward I wanted to cry... Seriously, I know that Onew is your junior and you have an image to maintain, but a fucking handshake? Are you kidding me?

Sigh... for that, it's a (7/10) for me. Which isn't bad, but it sure as hell needs to not be that awkward.

Next up is...

I know she's the "Kid Leader" and all, but is it so wrong for me to be aroused right now?

So is this the part where So Nyeo Shi Dae becomes Super Naughty Sexy Divas, or some shit like that? Seriously... Why the fuck is Taeyeon of all people looking sexy as fuck?

Visuals wise the stylist needs to be recommended into the Hall of Fame for that shit, she looks absolutely stunning here!

Listening to the performance however, it sort of betrays the vibe that I  got from the picture and the title of the song, instead it ended up being another ballad to add to the collection of Kim Taeyeon's fast growing library of ballad performances... Which is nice and all, but would it kill her to do something more risque for her solo stages?

No matter, vocally she's on point as always, and there really is something enchanting about her presence on stage in this song as well as the visuals, god I love the visuals here!

Unfortunately, her pronunciation is still pretty sub-standard and the whole going for the safe option is still disappointing, so it's gonna be (8/10) for her... Good hustle though!

Seohyun is next!

I love seeing her with a guitar, don't you?

Seohyun returns with a guitar in hand and a very chic black ensemble, but I don't really know shit about fashion so I'm not gonna talk too much about her outfit.

What I do know is that the visuals look good, but it's rather plain and the whole piece seems a bit too stripped back for my liking, oh well, I guess that's just Seohyun's style really.

Listening to it, she sounds nice as always and has the really cute and pretty style that works well for her, overall the performance isn't bad but is severely lacking on the wow factor... Also minus points for not actually playing the guitar and not even pretending properly. Could've had the wherewithal to match your strums to that of the guitar, you're an idol, surely you have more than enough co-ordination to handle that much. Truly disappointing.

Overall it's not bad, but it just screams filler for me and it just gets dull after a while... Only die hard Seohyun/OT9 fans could appreciate it. (6/10).

Onto the next one!

I would love to be their boy... Daaaayum.

Now this is where things heat up, I really liked this stage, but it wasn't due to the performance... Although that helped.

The vocals were mostly on point again, Tiffany has improved leaps and bounds but doing Hyorin's parts are a bit too much for her right now... She really needs to work on loosening up those vocal cords because she could strain and get vocal nodules again if she's not careful.

Both of them look fantastic here and Yuri is actively trying to ruin my bias list I swear to Buddha, however the thing that makes me love the performance is the way they interacted with the lucky fans that got to get high fives from Tiffany and an eyeful of Yuri's well-toned ass (lucky motherfucker).

After getting to see Tiffany's eye-smile and Kwon Yuri's ass up close they decide to add more onto their five minutes of fame by doing the choreo to Ma Boy along with the girls, sending Tiffany into a fit and their dignity down the drain... Ah well, it was a laugh (as Miss Hwang could attest to) and added bonus points onto this performance for me. (8/10)

This next one is where my hormones come out to play, be warned...

UNF!!! GODDAMN SOONKYU I WANT TO EAT YOU UP!!!

Forgive me in advance for this, but Sunny is fucking hot! I don't care if I have to gun down Lee Sooman with a goddamn Howitzer for some Sunny Delight, I want a fucking piece!

Now I'm not gonna go in too depth about the vocals at this point, because this performance was clearly not intended for that aspect to be emphasized (she's covering Ga-In for frick's sake, that girl has a very nice voice but she never uses it in her songs... Not that I'm complaining).

I will say this much, her voice is way more stable than it was when she sung that ballad and Sunny is moving around quite a bit as well (of which I love the fact that she does)... Sunny really shone here in this performance because her stage presence was amazing, her facial expressions were superb, she barely went right up to the crowd but the interaction was most definitely there and her body is fucking amazing, where the fuck was that thing at when she was singing "Oppa, Saranghae~" with the rest of the girls!

Thus is the case of the myseterious Lee Soonkyu, she has a great talent for doing this style of song (as seen with her cover of Three by Britney Spears) yet here she is stuck with SNSD doing dumb crap like I Got A Boy. Don't get me wrong, fellow Sones, but I think SM should let SNSD do what Big Bang does and incorporate more Solo projects as opposed to sub units.

That however is another story for another time... I'm going off tangent here and I really should keep on track.

Sunny put out a really great outing here and I for one would be more than willing to see more stuff out of her in the future (9/10).

And now for my bias... If I don't make it back alive, tell my non-existent wife that she ain't getting shit from me!

I WAS NOT READY!!!

All jokes aside... Sooyoung is dangerously skinny here, her legs look like they could break at any moment and if my master plan pulls through and I finally do get to fuck the shit out of Sooyoung, I don't want to drag her ribcage out of her as well. The plot of my favourite hentai aside, this is yet another good performance...

Sooyoung has always been a prime example of someone who should be a JYP idol for me, she has that look and just fits beautifully into the style that is infamous within the Wonder Girls, miss A, etc.

Hence why I could only smile gleefully as I was proven right by her doing a cover of Sunmi's "24 Hours". She made the song her own and the choreography was almost perfectly executed (stylistic errors are bound to happen, and some of the moves cannot be accurately replicated simply due to the body types being so completely different).

Her singing is also a lot more stable, but it is a bit pitchy at times and she goes a bit flat on her phrasing, nonetheless she is doing a very good job with this song, the performance was great and she was shaking whatever little curves she has left, good on her! (8/10)

Finally, the main event, Sexica has arrived...

DAT SWIMSUIT THO!!!

Jessica... The fapgods have blessed you with the uncanny ability to make dicks hard with a glittery swimsuit.

Now as much as I love Lee Hyori, Jessica has destroyed the original for that night and made people forget it even existed... At least that's what it was like for me.

The vocals aren't as dynamic or "show-offy" as Jessica usually does, if anything they were very low and mellow, but so beautifully controlled that it just oozes something sensual into the atmosphere. Again however, the main point isn't the vocals, but bonus points for them being good.

Her fucking stage presence whilst wearing the dress was amazing, so empowering and cute at the same time,  she really had that prom queen vibe going for her and just got the crowd going... Then the lights dim out and the transformation into Sexica made me take my eye out with my pelvis.

Seriously, it was like a butterfly leaving its cocoon, only it just bloomed sexiness instead of a fucking bug. Goddamn it was just amazing and the crowd got so hyped as well!

Honestly the performance was very well done in general and Hyori would be proud (or jealous, take your pick) of Jessica for that. Now I can see why she was in line to be the next BoA (10/10)

Overall the Solo Performances for Marchen Fantasy where great! Some highs and lows were found, but this is getting me so hyped for SNSD's new release in January as well as the future of SNSD, which I will talk about in depth in my next article.

Thanks for reading!